Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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