she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I'm using her two yr old as a arm rest while I attempt to feel her up. Somehow she is allowing it. How this transitions to sex should be interesting.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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