their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
gay flight attendant. racoons. kegels. bartender with missing teeth. too many birthdays. fucckk.
I broke stuart's oven and showed up to the party with a squirrel.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I just had the polyamorous Canadian hockey player do the splits while naked in a handstand at my apartment just now. And yes, I know it’s 1:30am on a Thursday.
Randomize
