You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
She told me I should be a condom model.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
