the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I think your dad took our porno
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Randomize
