Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
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