I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
