i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Nah. And this is true. It's like you were trained by sexual Jedi or something.
*jedi wave* this is the penis you were looking for
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
Randomize
