I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
Successful New Year's Eve:: Your first shower of the year is on Jan. 2nd... 'cause you didn't trust yourself to stand up long enough on Jan. 1st. Hello 2010.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
So I'm trying to figure out if starting the day running around the quad in a black t-shirt and bikini w/ a drawn on mustache is a good way to start the day...
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
