It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize