Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
why did i wake up to an event notice that says "Shit Just Got Real"?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Why the fuck did I wake up in a chair with mouth clamps?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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