There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
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