whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
I chugged vodka from a 15 ft snorkel. What the fuck did you do with your life today?
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
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