Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize