First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Randomize
