Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize