I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
im so drunk with asians
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
Having a race with the dryer. Seeing who can get drunk/dry clothes faster.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home