That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Houston, we have a squirter
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
I know how vodka works Grace. I'm drunk, not stupid.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
