I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
March Madness means a buffet of emotionally vulnerable dick at the bars almost every night. So yeah my vagina and I are big fans.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
Randomize