Do you still have your period?
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
