is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
Randomize
