I CAN MOONWALK!
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I was going to ask the people in the kitchen to keep the volume down, but they're cooking pasta at 3 AM and one complimented me on my polka-dot nightgown. They're high. No volume control.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?