ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
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She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
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I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists