I just cut my nipple shaving
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
Talking her gay man friend into dancing with me officially makes me the world's best wingman. ever.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
