One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
