I asked what she wanted from Hawaii. She said a baby like Aaden from JK 8.
where am I supposed to find one of those?
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
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