I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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