now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
He took my Spanx off and still fucked me twice. I call that success.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
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