THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I am so getting Plan B when we get home. Not getting knocked up by a dude with a hair piece.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
My mother is even happier about me having a sugar daddy than I am
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
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