She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Just told myself the phrase "You're not THAT single" while dressing myself
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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