Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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