I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I seem to have left my pride at pride
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Okay I'm all about any plan that ends with "We're gonna get you drunk."
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
When I came home you were using a glowstick to eat peanut butter from the jar.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
