I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
Banned from zoo.
Again?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I didn't hate myself when I woke up today, that's improvement right?
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Randomize
