I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
do nipples grow back?
Randomize