is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Why did I not realize how important my fridge was till I was drunk. It keeps all my food cold its like my own cold box
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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