Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
Han Solo would be ashamed of me.
Getting free blow from a total stranger, who asked permission to stroke my eyebrows, was the highlight of my evening out. Also, I have a new cuddle dealer.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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