If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
Michael Bay is the white Tyler Perry.
I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Randomize