I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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