just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
It took 5 bourbons for him to handcuff and spank me and then he cried after sex. The men that like me are so unstable.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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