I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
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