What a fucking waste of an outfit
I found your twin in sf. His name is ryan. And you are the evil one.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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