I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
I can die happy now, I have been kicked out of strip clubs on six different continents
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
Randomize
