nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Remember that pair of super cute shorts I pooped in? I miss those 😔
Just looked at the TV in the bar for the weather report. Didn't want to walk home drunk during a tornado warning
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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