Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Randomize
