my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
I'm so drunk. Remember me this way.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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