just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I'm sitting in the breakroom facing a very large sign that says "inappropriate workplace behaviors", and i can't help but feel like it is directed at me
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Right as the plane left the gate the brownies kicked in. I dont think the guy next to me appreciated my engine noises as we took off
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Randomize