I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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