Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
The only things in my fridge are almond milk, Smirnoff Ice and chicken noodle soup. I'd say I've done mama proud.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
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