so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
He found a way to charmingly ask me for a threesome and when I said no he made it sound like he was even happier. He's a fucking wizard
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
Randomize
