We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
I'm not gonna lie, my internet creeping skills scare me. I'm like Liam Neeson in Taken
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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