my vag is so smooth its legendary
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
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